Afternoon Vibes with Ms. Jessica

Weekdays 3:00 PM-7:00 PM

Ms. Jessica & her daddy

If your dad is anything like mine, he loves telling a good riddle and a DAD JOKE!  In fact, he enjoys them so so much that he and my nephews have “Joke Tuesday“.  That’s when they text each other jokes to see who has the best one.  (I’ll admit, some of them are pretty funny.)

My dad actually wore this shirt out in public when he came to visit me one summer. #Embarrassing

Well, Father’s Day is this Sunday so I put together a list of 27 jokes you can try out on your dad.  Check em out and let me know which one is your favorite.

  • How do you follow Will Smith in the snow?  You follow the fresh prints.
  • How do you make 7 even?  Take away the s.
  • How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten tickles.
  • I asked my dog what’s two minus two. He said nothing.
  • I don’t trust those trees. They seem kind of shady.
  • I only know 25 letters of the alphabet. I don’t know y.
  • If a child refuses to nap, are they guilty of resisting a rest?
  • This graveyard looks overcrowded. People must be dying to get in.
  • Wanna hear a joke about paper? Never mind—it’s tearable.
  • What concert costs just 45 cents? 50 Cent featuring Nickelback!
  • What did Baby Corn say to Mama Corn?  Where’s Pop Corn?
  • What did one hat say to the other?” “Stay here! I’m going on ahead.
  • What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?  Supplies!
  • What did the ocean say to the beach?  Nothing it just waved.
  • What do you call a fake noodle?  An “impasta”.
  • What do you call a fish wearing a bowtie?  “Sofishticated”
  • What do you call it when a snowman throws a tantrum?  A meltdown.
  • What does a bee use to brush its hair?  A honeycomb!
  • What has more letters than the alphabet?  The post office!
  • What time did the man go to the dentist? Tooth hurt-y.
  • When two vegans get in an argument, is it still called a beef?
  • Where do you learn to make a banana split?  Sundae school.
  • Why can’t a nose be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot.
  • Why can’t you hear a psychiatrist using the bathroom? Because the ‘P’ is silent.
  • Why didn’t the skeleton climb the mountain?  It didn’t have the guts.
  • Why do fathers take an extra pair of socks when they go golfing? In case they get a hole in one!
  • Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack each other up.